10 Questions You Should Ask The Person You Are Dating

If you were going for a job interview you would have a huge list of questions to ask the company, so why would you not prepare some questions for your date? Here we show you 10 of the best questions to ask your date to find out if they are right for you.

1. Are you a saver or a spender?

Although we all like to think money doesn’t matter when it comes to love, if you’re going to get serious with your date you need to know if they are a saver or a spender and understand how their attitude to money corresponds to your habits.

How to ask this question: To subtly ask this question ask your date where they went away this year. If the location seems to be within their means when you consider their job then your date is probably good with cash.

2. Are you seeing anyone else?

Establishing where you stand and what kind of relationship you are in is really important if you don’t want to end up hurt or hurting your date. Find out what they think your relationship is to avoid unnecessary confusion.

How to ask this question: There is no subtle way of asking this question and it is best to simply ask it directly. Prepare another topic of conversation though in case the situation becomes awkward once you have asked.

3. The list

Once you’ve been dating for a little while and you think you could get serious with your date it’s time to write down the names of every person you have dated or slept with. You might think nothing is worth this humiliation, but finding out three months into a relationship that your boyfriend slept with your sister and never called her back is not a fate anyone should have to suffer.

How to ask this question: Watching a film where a couple write a list of people they dated is a great way to introduce the idea and will help you to ask this question.

4. Do you have children?

You would be surprised by the amount of people who don’t ask whether their date has kids and by how many parents struggle to tell their date that they have children when not asked.

How to ask this question: If you want to ask this question you could talk about one of your friends or relatives who have kids and then after telling a funny anecdote about their children casually asks your date if they have children.

5. Why did you break up?

Why past relationships in your date’s life broke down can reveal a great deal about your date. Not only can you judge their values from past break ups, you can also begin to understand any insecurities they may have inherited as a result of their ex. Remember though, their explanation for a break up is just one side of the story.

How to ask this question: Avoid talking about exes on your first few dates, but after you’ve gone out together four or five times then you could begin to talk about your own ex and how you broke up. Once you’ve finished you can then ask about your current dates past break ups.

6. Religion and politics

Religion and politics are very sensitive topics and in part they are sensitive because they are important to people. Knowing how your views about the world correspond will help you understand one another better and help you judge whether you have a future together.

How to ask this question: To ask directly what someone’s religious and political views are can be seen as being blunt and it can sometimes be best to ask questions about your date’s life and their opinions on current affairs, which in turn will reflect their religious and political views.

7. Can I meet your friends?

This is a very telling question and you need to watch your date’s reaction closely if you want to understand how they feel about you. If they seem really keen for you to meet their friends then it’s a sign they really like you, but if your date seems a little hesitant perhaps they’re not quite ready for that level of commitment yet.

How to ask this question: Wait for your date to talk about one of their friends or what they got up to at the weekend before asking whether you could meet their friends soon. This will make the question seem less planned and it will seem more natural.

8. Marriage

If you’ve got your heart set on tying the knot or if you can’t see yourself ever wanting to get married then it’s best to share your opinion on weddings as early as possible. Although the connection you feel is important, for a relationship to work your plans for the future have to complement each other, so be honest and share your thoughts about marriage.

How to ask this question: Chances are if you’re thinking about weddings then so are your friends. If someone you know gets engaged or actually has their wedding whilst you are dating use this opportunity to bring up the topic of marriage.

9. Pets

It seems like the silliest of things when you begin dating but if your date is a big dog lover and you can’t stand animals then this may cause a big problem five years down the line.

How to ask this question: Ask your date if they have any pets. If they don’t then ask them why; they may be pet-less because of their circumstances and not because they don’t desperately want animals.

10. Hobbies

When they are single, people tend to fill their lives up with friends, volunteering, hobbies and work. Yet once you start to date someone seriously you need them to give up some of their activities in order to give your relationship the time and attention it needs to succeed. Some people struggle to do this though and it can cause a lot of heartache.

How to ask this question: Ask your date what the most important things in their life are and try to gauge whether their sports team is always going to be number one in their life.

6 Ways To A Happy, Healthy Relationship

Contrary to what your favorite rom-com would have you believe, a happy relationship doesn't just happen. Here are 6 ways to make sure your relationship is on track.

1. Pay attention to your tone when you talk

It may seem like a small thing, but it can have a big effect. People respond well to a soft tone and immediately get hostile or defensive towards a harsh one. Be aware not just what you say to your partner in a daily way, but how you say it. A sweet tone as well as a sweet approach will minimize any clashes between you and make the daily grind less difficult and just more pleasant.

2. Listen without your walls, guards, and counter arguments at the ready

As important as it is to communicate your own needs, hopes and expectations in your relationship it’s equally crucial to hear your partner too. When couples are disconnected, bickering or outright hostile, the tendency to listen is at a low point. But if that’s when you choose to “lay down your guns”, stop arguing back, and just hear their point of view, it’s a fast track to bringing you closer again, and back to happy, healthy connected communication. Sometimes to truly hear your partner when your negative emotional brain is clouding your listening ability, it’s a good strategy to paraphrase what they are saying to you so it sinks in and you can hear it in your own voice to better absorb it.

3. Make a conscious effort to smile, and be approachable

If you’re in an argument in your relationship, sit down then, or make an arrangement to sit down together to talk it through sooner rather than later. If there are small squabbles between you, live your life as positively as possible. Scowling through your day only magnifies issues and difficulties and improves nothing. Regardless of how your partner is behaving, if you are nice it will rub off. It’s hard to be mean, unkind or abrasive to someone who is being genuinely caring and kind, even when they are still kind of mad! Fix what you can from your end, be the partner you want to have, and watch the positive effect that has, without a single argument.

4. Have empathy

Before becoming deeply engaged in arguments and conflict, try to pause for a moment to see the other person's perspective. True partners are always doing the best they can, and if it’s falling short of your needs and expectations, try to see why before criticizing. And if there is a legitimate reason to complain, do it in a productive way rather than a fight-provoking one. That means first acknowledging where they are coming from, so they feel understood right off the bat, and then expressing what your need or expectation is despite or above that. For example, "I know you’re tired in the evening after a long day at work and an early start, and I’m tired too, but I could really use a little more help at night with the chores/children etc." Rather than attack for lack of helpfulness, acknowledge why they might not be helping as much and point out why you need an adjustment to your established routine.

5. Keep the big picture in mind

Choose your battles and remember what’s most important. If you want a harmonious relationship, remember why you chose your partner, and remind yourself that every day you choose to be with them and they choose you too. Let go of some of the smaller issues. Would you divorce over the dishwasher? Not every fight needs to be a five alarm fire. Simmer down if you’re butting heads a lot and remember that being happy together is the most important detail to focus on.

6. Stay invested in your relationship

Feeling distant or disconnected? Do something fun together, take a class, learn together, and grow together. Play together too! Get the passions sizzling again if it has been awhile? How? Take an online course like Passion and Pleasure together.

3 Easy Ways To Attract Love Like A Magnet

If you are still single and yearning for that someone special to come into your life, to share your life, and to share all the laughter and joy of being together, there is something you could do to attract your true love like a magnet.

1. You must believe you are able to attract true love.

This is important! In order to attract your true love, not just any type of lovers, to come into your life, you have to believe you are able to attract the right person into your life. True love comes to you not because of chance. Instead, it comes to you because of who you are. It comes through you; it does not come to you. You attract the people in your life because of who you are. If you are someone who is always cheery, generous, kind, and hardworking, then it is very likely you will attract people who have one or more of your positive attributes. Whoever you attract into your lives is a reflection of who you are at that moment. Thus if you are someone who is always doubtful of your own ability and capability to meet the right person, then it is very likely you will attract the wrong person into your life.

2. Love others who come into your life at this moment.

Being loving to others is perfect love, not just wanting love. Open up your heart and give your love to others as well while you are waiting for someone special to enter your life. When you open up and give more love, more love will return and be given you too. This is the law of give and receives. When you go outside and socialize, do not go with the intention of only wanting to find love, or to find your Mr or Mrs Right. Instead, take an interest in all those that you encounter, be aware of their welfare and needs as well. If you start to take an interest in other people's welfare and needs instead of only your own, more people will be attracted to you. So, detach yourself from the feeling that you want to find that someone special. The right person will definitely come to you one day and be attracted to you because of who you are. He or she might be around in corner thinking: "Hey, I want to get to know this person who has so much magnetism and optimism. How can I approach him or her?"

3. Expect less from other people and give more instead.

As you give more and more love to others, be careful not to become too much focused on your own wants and needs. In wanting or expecting to experience the love we want, we suffer. We crave, and we cling to what we do not have and we even refuse to let go what we have clung to. Your giving should not come with any conditions. Instead, the love you give should want less and less. As your love wants less and less, ironically you will find more love coming your way, even without you asking for it.

Give true love, so that it opens up and embrace the world. Very soon, you will find that someone special entering your life. It is not by chance that this person has entered your life, but you have cultivated the 'seeds' to bring him or her to you, not just any type of person, but the right and true one for you. And after he or she has entered your life, continue to cultivate even more 'seeds' of love for everyone around you, and you will find that you can easily create the magical relationship that you desire effortlessly.